I assume I died during the surgery as I found myself floating in the night sky filled with stars. I knew I must have died because I was there with my husband, Miles, who had died in my arms six months before at Stanford University Hospital. I was overjoyed to be with him again.

He told me he had created a diagram of our eternal love before he died. It was based on the Tetragrammaton. He then showed me the diagram. He also told me he had given the diagram to his friend Neal (who lives in Florida) and that Neal would deliver the diagram to my hospital bed.

Then he told me it was time for me to go back. I told him I didn't want to go back, that I wanted to stay with him. But he said no. I had to go back because I had more work to do, and he would come for me when it was my time.

I woke up in a hospital bed and tried very hard to find the diagram, as I was worried I would accidentally crush it in bed. I still keep asking him why he sent me back. We were very close, and life feels empty without him.